Well hot damn, you look good!
I bet right about now you're glad that you wore all that sunscreen. Although, with that pale alabaster skin of yours your veins might be the star of the show right about now. Well I'm pretty sure we can all agree that veins are better that age spots and sun spots any day.
By now you probably have about 28 grandchildren (good thing you had three girls huh? haha!). Hopefully they all help out with chores around your place, since you worked so hard to teach their mama's the right way to make a bed. Don't forget to tell the grandchildren all about the ridiculous things you did in your youth. I'm sure you could write a book of all the pranks you've pulled by now. Damn you're funny! Make sure you embrace all your grandchildren and teach them the grace that your grandmother taught you.
You probably get some awesome comments on your tattoos. Knowing myself, you probably have a handful of witty comebacks. Those tattoos are just a reminder of how awesome you were in your youth, and still are at 70. Thank God you didn't get a butterfly huh?!
I hope you took a shit ton of pictures on that trip to Puerto Rico when you were 35. Because your girls and grandchildren will want to see your adventures and how you managed to keep your style all these years. And that trip to Europe when you were 36, well..thank God the airports changed their law on how much wine you could bring back. Am I right?
Thank God you've got Eric. Let's face it, he appreciates all of you and makes you giddy inside..even after all these years. I bet you two have been through more than I can imagine right now, but I know that you came out stronger than you were when you went into those storms. Nice work you two!
I bet your love for all furry creatures has grown, if that's even possible. How many cats do you have now? Or should I say, how many does Eric think you have? Nice job on talking Eric into letting you bring them all inside when it rains.
I hope you still use your artistic side, and no.. making bird feeders out of old bleach bottles does not count. Stay away from the recycling bin! Just in case you're not as lucid as you'd like, this is just a friendly reminder that your grandchildren DO NOT WANT CLOTHES for their birthdays. NO MATTER WHAT do not buy your grandchildren clothes! Ever.
I know you're still pretty active, probably the instructor of your hip hop water aerobics class or something. You better be rocking that two piece you hot mama you! No one pieces with attached skirts! That makes you look old.
Well lady, you did it. You made it through a lot of shit storms (by the grace of God!) and I'm sure you have one hell of a story to tell. Write it down. Remember your grandmothers story? No? Oh well of course not, because it wasn't written down, so all you remember are the bits and pieces that were told in stories.
Write.it.down. You're grandchildren and their children will want to read all about your silly antics and your big ol' heart.
Make sure you include it all..even the story of the first day of 7th grade when the 8th grade girl pooped on your trapper keeper..yeah, that one (could also be filed under shit storm).
xoxo
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